Crafting a Calming Bedtime Routine for Your Child's Sleep Difficulties

Bedtime may be a stressful endeavor if your child struggles with winding down for bed, falling asleep, or getting up in time for school the next morning. Insomnia, or difficulty falling or staying asleep, is common in children. Sleep difficulties in children are associated with poorer mood and academic functioning, and persistent insomnia is associated with poorer health outcomes. Quality sleep and healthy sleep schedules are integral to a child’s development and wellbeing. Childhood sleep difficulties may be caused or exacerbated by anxiety, changes in routine, or lifestyle factors such as consuming excessive sugar or screentime before bed.

In this blog post, we offer some guidance on crafting a bedtime routine to promote better sleep for children with sleep difficulties.

How do I know if my child might have insomnia?

o Observe your child for common symptoms of insomnia, which include:

• Difficulty falling asleep once in bed

• Difficulty staying asleep

• Waking up too early or difficulty waking up in the morning

• Daytime sleepiness or fatigue

• Irritability

o Pay attention to your child’s sleep patterns and note their sleep and wake times

• You may track these in a sleep log to show your pediatrician or a specialist

Why a bedtime routine?

Bedtime routines are a powerful behavioral tool that may help address your child’s sleep difficulties. Consistent routines around bedtime may benefit your child’s school readiness and wellbeing.

Bedtime routines help signal to the body that it is time to wind down and get ready to go to sleep. The more consistent these routines are the more effective they will become through conditioning, or your child’s body and mind learning through association to begin relaxing in time for bed. Routines may also reduce anxiety for children by providing a sense of structure and security.

What makes a good bedtime routine?

o Consistency is key

• Consistent sleep/wake and bedtime routine start times help regulate you child’s internal clock

o Create a soothing environment

• Avoid bright lights and blue light

• Opt for dim lighting lower in the eyeline (e.g., a table lamp is preferable to overhead lights)

• Reduce noise in the room or space where the bedtime routine takes place

• You may play soothing quiet music or white noise to help with relaxation

• Keep the space at a comfortable temperature

o Customization

• Each child is unique and will need their bedtime routine to be customized to their needs as well as what they find enjoyable and relaxing

• Involve your child in planning their routine to promote a sense of agency (e.g., let your child pick if they want chamomile or rooibos tea, or if they would prefer coloring to reading, etc.)

What should my child avoid leading up to bedtime?

o Screen time

• Replace activities such as watching TV on scrolling on the phone with screen-free alternatives such as reading a book or comic, drawing, or playing a game

o Caffeine and Sugar

• Replace caffeinated/sugary treats and beverages with alternatives such as herbal tea or small non-sugary snacks

What elements could my child include in their bedtime routine?

o Yoga

• Pick a brief series of calming poses or find a bedtime yoga video from your favorite yoga creator on YouTube or a similar platform

o Stories

• Read your child a bedtime story, or if they are older help them pick a book, audiobook, or podcast to read or listen to themselves

o Screen-Free Activities

• Additional screen-free activities could include coloring, knitting, playing a card game, or spending quality time with a pet

o Self-Care

• For some self-care routines such as a bath or a skin care regimen may be incorporated into the routine as relaxing activities

o Meditation

• For some children, especially those with anxiety, doing a quick meditation between 1 and 10 minutes may be helpful

• Meditations may be found online or through phone apps

• For younger children, doing the meditation together may be helpful

Establishing a new routine takes time and patience. It will also take your child’s body time to adjust to their new sleep/wake time. Sticking to the set wake time, getting some sunshine and movement first thing in the morning, and remaining patient and consistent will help your child adjust more easily.

When can a professional help?

A therapist can help establish a behavior plan to fit your child’s sleep needs and support their sleep regulation. If your child’s sleep difficulties become overwhelming or are negatively impacting their mood and school performance, a therapist can also help address underlying concerns such as anxiety or ADHD, as well as offer parent and child coaching on relaxation and mindfulness techniques for bedtime. For children with insomnia, your pediatrician can also place a referral for a sleep study or sleep specialist.

Sources:

1. Combs, D., Goodwin, J. L., Quan, S. F., Morgan, W. J., Shetty, S., & Parthasarathy, S. (2016, June 13). Insomnia, health-related quality of life and Health Outcomes in children: A seven year longitudinal cohort. Scientific reports. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4904740/

2. Insomnia. Boston Children’s Hospital. (n.d.). https://www.childrenshospital.org/conditions/insomnia

3. Kitsaras, G., Goodwin, M., Allan, J., Kelly, M. P., & Pretty, I. A. (2018). Bedtime routines child wellbeing & development. BMC Public Health, 18(1), 386. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12889-018-5290-3